Advanced Weaponry Test (with bonus satellite features).

[eureka_npcs]

Jack never liked school. He was good enough at it to work his way up to US Marshal, of course, but the bonus of that was in between law memorization and the bizarrely mandatory higher mathematics courses, there was weapons training.

It balanced out.

What wasn't balancing out at the moment was Jack's attention on the far-too-ominous stack of stapled paper.

A paper test. About guns. Life was not fair.

With a huff, Jack caps his standard-issue ballpoint to place it down on his standard-issue desk, and he handed it to his deputy across the police station office to grade.

Comments

[eureka_npcs]

Fargo holds up the TV dinner sized univeral remote.

"Spencer, how do you work this thing?"

[eureka_npcs]

It's a quick movement, but enough to set that blond hair moving again as Spencer springs the remote control from Fargo's grasp.

"Nobody touches the Master Commander." To the be-aproned man over by a rather poor excuse for a kitchenette: "Vincent! We need food."

[eureka_npcs]

As Taggart and Fargo voice their support of Spencer's demand Vincent shoots everyone a look. His voice is filled with good-natured chiding, "Patience, heathens, patience." He turns back to the tray in front of him and makes a few (strictly unnecessary) flourishes before turning picking the tray up and moving out of the kitchen area.

"Okay," he brandishes the tray grandly. "Roasted jalapeno maize kernals with demiglace. Get 'em while they're still steaming."

[eureka_npcs]

Fargo looks incensed. Which kind of looks more like pouty, but what can you do?

"But it's movie night! I need my popcorn..."

[eureka_npcs]

Vincent takes a moment to look mildly offended before rolling his eyes at Fargo, "Expand and indulge your palete, Fargo," he held the tray out.

Reaching across Fargo, Taggart snags a handful of kernals and offers a sneer, "Phillistine."

[eureka_npcs]

The red icon indicating the satellite's position in orbit over western Oregon flicks to green; a symbol of readiness.

"We’re locked on! In seconds, a first-run flick destined for the multiplex will be coming to your local Spencer-plex -- " And with a (completely necessary) flourish, Spencer clicks off the lights in the trailer and turns on the overhead projector, the screen in front of the quartet flooding with light.

[eureka_npcs]

Everyone leans forward reflexively as the sound system swells with the opening theme. An image swims into focus on the screen; bright, crisp lettering: 'They Came To Conquer'. Taggart's voice is awed, reverent, "Ripper."

[eureka_npcs]

A still seething Jo marches up the steps to Spencer's aluminum front door to pound on it.

"Spencer! SPENCER! Spencer!"

She gives up on being heard and walks in, her hands over her ears.

"HELLO? Officer of the law?"

She gives them a couple seconds and tries again.

"What’s wrong with you people? Turn it down!"

[eureka_npcs]

Spencer doesn't even look up.

"What? Why?"

[eureka_npcs]

"The neighbors are complaining about the noise!"

[eureka_npcs]

Spencer's nose wrinkles. "What neighbors?"

He needs to move his trailer if he's got to start worrying about neighbors now.

[eureka_npcs]

She sneers and snaps back.

"The state of Idaho. Turn it DOWN"

[eureka_npcs]

"Hi, Jo," Taggart says without turning from the screen. "Have a sit. Like a tinnie?" Still not looking away from the screen, "Vincent? Get Jo a beer."

[eureka_npcs]

Ooh...Beer...No. Officer of the law. Bet Carter would take one...

"I'm on duty."

[eureka_npcs]

"I can respect that." Taggart smiles, sparing a glance over his shoulder, "Like it to go?"

[eureka_npcs]

Yesyesyesyes...ooh...

On screen:
"Looks human, but it’s just a guise. I’ve seen it. It’s hideous, under the skin."
"My God! What do they want?"
"Us, our planet, our water. Maybe it’s fuel to them."

Jo isn't immune to a good aliens among us flick and her eyes go wide.

On screen:
"What was that?" A scream and a massive explosion

That's it. Jo is in a seat, as glued to the screen as any of the boys.

"What are we watching?"

[eureka_npcs]

"They Came to Conquer," Spencer offers in an appropriately reverent voice, still hushed and leaning in toward the screen.

[eureka_npcs]

"When did that come out?"

She kicks herself a little for missing what was obviously a great movie.

[eureka_npcs]

Now appropriately shifty: "Next week."

[eureka_npcs]

Jo smacks his shoulder. Bad Spencer. No biscuit. But still...

"The picture's...amazing..."

[eureka_npcs]

"Yeah, it is."

The audience, now plus one, keep their eyes glued to the screen.

"He’s just the host. The creature’s protected inside -- "
"How do we get it out?"
"We cut it out."

Screams and mechanical whirring and rather disgusting dripping noises, and all of the audience is enraptured.

[eureka_npcs]

"Unbelievable. Yet...believable..."

Fargo sits back, a little dazed.

[eureka_npcs]

"Definitely," Vincent agrees.

Taggart's eyes are wide as he nods, "'s like being there."

[eureka_npcs]

Jo blinks out of the movie haze and looks at her watch.

"Oh man, I gotta go. Hey, you guys keep it down, okay?"

She stands up.

[eureka_npcs]

"I'll walk you out. You know, in case of alien invasion," Taggart offers, pushing himself to his feet.

Swallowing, Fargo stands up too, "Strength in numbers..." He follows them to the door. Then, just before walking out, he turns back to their host, "Spencer," his voice is dead serious, "that was a life-altering experience."